Major Update: Things I've Seen Out My Window At Work

Domestic Dispute.

So yellow-shirt man, white-dress woman, and child are walking down the street. Pick-up truck pulls over and white-shirt man and track-suit woman jump out. Loud argument ensues. White-shirt man rips off his shirt. We call the cops.

Police show up surprisingly fast. There seems to be a dispute over who owns the kid. Lots of yelling, white-dress woman points at elbow (abuse?). Cops pull kid aside, kid points to yellow shirted man, cops let girl go back over by yellow-shirt man and white dress woman. More yelling. Cops tell track-suit woman and white-shirt man to get in the truck. They do. There is a lot of phone calls happening, with the police talking to various people on cell phones owned by white-dress woman and white-shirt man.

Truck drives off after cops get ID info and take notes. Yellow-shirt man, white dress woman, and child get into the back of the squad car. Police drive off.

I should add that this whole process lasted about 45 minutes. Everyone in the office was glued to the window throughout the duration of the fight, and we were highly disappointed in the FedEx delivery man who came up, but didn't hear enough to tell us what was going on. Moral of the story, if you're delivering a box to a building and there's a major fight going on, slow down and hear some dirt!

Things I've Seen Out My Window

Ahh, working above the mean streets of south Minneapolis. Needless to say, I've witnessed some head scratchers. Here's the list so far (minus things I've already forgotten)

1. Man in full on Tux, complete with tails, walking up the sidewalk carrying a white briefcase.

2. Car with round hole punched into the front bumper. I have no clue how this really happened, but I like to think he ran into Thumbelina on a miniature horse. It is a little known fact that Thumbelina is a knight and carries a lance the size of a large pipe. She uses it to joust against cars, or she did once anyway. I know how it ended for the car, not so sure how Thumbelina turned out.

3. Speaking of Cars, there's currently a car parked out front with a large oval shaped indent in the hood. It really is almost a perfect oval, so I doubt it was caused by a person falling on it, but one can dream.

4. A 12 year old (looking) kid dealing drugs from his bike.

5. I didn't witness this one, but my office mate came in rather early today and spotted a prostitute get into a car with a John.

6. The best ever. Figure out what happened here: Van is parked out front. Cop car pulls up behind the van. Cop 1 gets out, brings some papers over to driver of an old van. Not a mini van, an actual van. Cop 2 gets out, his hand casually resting on his gun, and positions himself on the other side of the car. Man gets out, argues with cops. Man walks just fine (this is relevant later) Lots of arm waving. Man signs papers (search warrant?), using the back of the van as a desk. Man opens van. Cops remove a wheel chair from the back of the van. Cops fold the wheel chair and put it in the trunk of the cop car. Man signs more papers. Man walks off down the street. Apparently, he isn't being arrested. Tow truck comes and takes the car (impound?). Cops leave after tow truck.

Update:

7. (heard, not seen) Someone yelling like Tarzan. Yes I did hear this on the second floor through the closed windows.

8. Random sock lying on the sidewalk.

9. Group walking down the street. Man wearing jeans so low that they were literally below his butt. No boxers, just tighty-whiteys. Other members of the party were relatively normal. Relatively. Seriously tempted to run after him to ask how they stay "up."

10. Santa. Seriously. Santa is on vacation in South Minneapolis. He just walked past wearing jean shorts, a grey t-shirt, and a black beanie. I managed to resist the temptation of running outside to ask for a pony...or a job.

A Taste of Things to Come

So, I've been busy settling into my new abode in MN, performing bridesmaid duties, working, making friends with police detectives, and, naturally, lying around doing nothing. Needless to say (since you can see the date of my last post as well as I can), I haven't gotten around to updating this space. I know, I know. I'm horrible with it. However, I would like to take the time to brainstorm some idea for exciting blog posts that I might start working on this weekend. In no particular order:

1. The year of republican women? What does this mean for Democrats?

2. Hillary Clinton (because I never get tired of talking about how wonderful my hero is)

3. Sen. Robert Byrd

4. The new Wonder Woman and feminism

5. How much I love the library

6. Family Law in MN, because I FINALLY have a job where I can actually discuss what I'm doing. Yay for not having attorney-client privileges messing up my blogging!

No, I Won't Ever Let It Go

Ok, if you know me at all you know I am somewhat obsessed with Hillary Clinton. I took off school in DC to fly home to MN to caucus for her in the primary. I campaigned for her in some fashion in 6 states and the District. I have t-shirts, books, sweat-shirts, hats, bags, The Nutcracker, the comic book, campaign signs, pins, everything but that really expensive DVD that I couldn't afford (still a little bitter. Oh well, someday I'll be rich and I'll find it on ebay). Actually, obsessed might be too weak a word.

Needless to say, the primaries are never far from my mind. So, I was working on this paper/presentation for my health care reform class. I opted to compare state-initiated reforms in 2 states: Massachusetts and West Virginia. I'm looking at the social, political, and economic differences in the states and trying to use that data to explain the different reform paths each state is taking. (Short version: MA is rich, white-collar liberals who went with an insurance mandate and state based insurance system; WV is poor, unhealthy, leans moderate/conservative and opted for a very slow piecemeal reform package that did not involve state based insurance or a mandate)

Anyway, since WV passed their reform plan in 2009 and MA passed theirs in 2006, I figured I'd use the 2004 and 2008 presidential results as a way to show political affiliation in the (10 minute) oral presentation. The statistics are quick, to the point, and don't take a lot of explaining. Given what a powerful year it was for Democrats, I expected Obama to have out-performed Kerry in Massachusetts. Nope. They nabbed the exact same percentage of the vote--62%.

In West Virginia, I expected Kerry to have out-performed Obama. After all. WV went strongly for Hillary (of course, so did Massachusetts, but WV knocked it out of the park for her). The really clincher for me was the discussion of the "racism factor" in the WV primary. It was all over the news: Clinton won because West Virginians are racist. The pundits were yelling it from all the blogs and all the "news" shows. CNN was even selling "headline t-shirts" reading "Clinton Should Reject White, Racist Vote." (Objectivity Fail). Anyway, given all the hype, I really expected Kerry to outperform Obama. I mean, wouldn't all those racist West Virginia democrats vote for McCain? Or, at the very least, stay home? Maybe not all of them, but a good percentage. I checked the 2008 and 2004 results and guess what I found? WV looked a lot like MA. In 2004, Bush won West Virginia 56-43%. In 2008, McCain won West Virginia 56-43%.

Now, I lived in WV for a time, and I'll be the first to admit that racism is alive and well there. I'm pretty convinced that it is alive and well everywhere. Maybe party trumps race in a general election but not a primary (where the candidates are rather similar politically). Maybe all the racist Democrats in West Virginia woke up sometime in September and decided that racism was old news. I don't know, but, honestly, the results make me question the racism hype. Maybe, just maybe, West Virginians are no more racist than any other voters; they're just more willing to say stupid things about it on TV. If that's the case, then I think the media owes the state an apology.

http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/wed-may-14-2008/indecision-2008---west-virginia

Beware the Kamikaze Prius

Yes yes yes, I was going to use the more modern 'beware of kamikaze prius(es?)" but the phrasing seemed to call for a plural and I just couldn't figure out the plural of Prius. Apparently, some people have suggested Prii, Priuses, or Priora. One Latin expert announced that the plural should be Priora (masculine) or Priores (feminine). Here's a link to the exact same thing I just said if you don't trust me.

Anyway, back to my original idea. I've always said that my Prius is smarter than I am (and I'm rather bright, to say the least). My car knows when I approach and unlocks as soon as I grab the handle. It turns on when I'm in the car without me having to pull out my keys. When I try to lock my keys in the car or forget to turn the car off (this happens with surprising frequency), my Prius yells at me. It tells me all kinds of useful things and the car wheels on the cute little engine diagram even spin when my wheels are rolling! Really, this car is a genius.

I don't know about you, but I've always been a little suspicious of technology that's smarter than the people who use it. (Wasn't there a movie about that going horribly wrong?) However, I believe Priores (I have elected the feminine form based on the cars' obvious intellectual superiority) are essentially good and noble cars. In fact, they are down right self-sacrificing--willing to hurl themselves into oblivion for the sake of the human race. These brave Kamikaze Priores have decided that their owners are unworthy of life, and have valiantly attempted to save humanity from them. (Cue oh my god you're making fun of the dead hate mail)

Here's the thing. Old people are a drain on society. Sure, we tend to be sentimentally attached to them and they provide wisdom and all that wonderful stuff (I admittedly don't want any of MY old people to kick the bucket in the near future), but think like an economist. Once retired, most don't create anything productive. They tend not to spend a lot of money (never know when you're going to die, so you can't spend all that fixed income in one place, plus they've already accumulated a ton of stuff), they're a total drain on our government (we could so easily balance the budget if we dumped medicare and social security), and they tend to drive annoying slow (I really hate slow drivers. If you ever want to witness crazy road rage, take a drive around charlottesville with me).

Why am I harping on old people when talking about Kamikaze Priores? Because Kamikaze Priores seem to have something against old people as well. Of the 24 runaway Prius drivers whose age was reported, 16 were over the age of 50. That 2/3rds of the drivers were over the age of 50 is kind of staggering when you consider that (as of 2007, the latest year I could find numbers for) only 23% of Prius drivers were over the age of 50. Yes, 24 cases is a small sample size, but when you only have 50 some cases to start with...

As if I needed more excuses to keep driving my (for now) non-Kamikaze Prius, here's another one. Apparently, at least 2 of these stories were total crap. That stint out in California? Yeah...the Federal Government couldn't find anything wrong with that Prius. Plus that guy's story was all over the place. He didn't want to shift down because (he claimed) he was afraid to take his hands off the steering wheel, yet he was talking to 911 on his cell phone? Ok, maybe he had a bluetooth conveniently in place and voice commands on his cell phone so he could just tell it to call 911, but then he said he "reached" down to tug on the accelerator which was stuck. You reached down to play with your pedals but moving your hand 3 inches to grasp the nob on your right to change gears was too scary? Sure. If you buy that, I have some ocean front property in Iowa to sell you...Here's an interesting article from Forbes about this guy. He seems slightly less than trustworthy, to say the least.

Anyway, right after that, one of those darn Kamikaze Priores struck again, this time in NY. Once again, federal investigators took a look at the car and it seems that the (56 year old) driver never applied the brakes (you know, those things that slow/stop your car...) and that the throttle was fully open when the driver crashed into a wall. Luckily, no one was seriously injured (the driver bumped up her knee, poor lady). Generally, braking systems in modern cars are much more powerful than the engines. If your brakes and your engine are in a fight, your car will slow down (assuming your breaks are properly maintained.) Actually, the Prius is designed to AUTOMATICALLY TURN OFF if your break and accelerator pedals are floored at the same time (thus saving the engine and the breaks and your neck. The first two are certainly good things, the last depends on the driver).

Yeah, so needless to say, I'm still driving my precious Prius. Why? Because: 1. Despite my attempts to lock my keys in my car, I think my car believes that I am a sufficiently productive member of society. 2. I'm not old. Either old people hate Priores or Priores hate old people. 3. I kind of think these runaway prius reports are filed a bunch of people either seeking their 15 minutes of fame or blaming the cars for their own mistakes. No matter what, my bases seem to be covered.

Don't get me wrong though, if I crash into something (or get pulled over at 90 mph), I'm totally blaming my car. At the very least, Toyota or the government will buy my totaled car in order to test it. Anyway, if the government is willing to hit Toyota with a ridiculously large fine for not reporting the "defect," surely they'll believe me when I tell them I tried to stop. I would like to take a second to note that the Government owns a large portion of one of Toyota's largest competitors and FEDERAL INVESTIGATORS COULDN'T FIND ANYTHING WRONG WITH THE CAR. I'm usually all about the government, but the fine seems a bit ridiculous, no?